How big is your faith? Is it big enough to move mountains? I know mine often isn’t. I find it hard to trust. I find it hard to accept that God’s plans for my life are not my own. I don’t understand why incredible people are brought into my life only to be taken out. I don’t see why God could not want me to have relationships, job opportunities, etc. that seem so good.
It hurts to want something good—something that seems like it should be pleasing to God—only to find out that it’s not gonna work.
Oftentimes, I’m tempted to sit in that hurt. Much like Job or the Psalmist, I cry out to God: “This hurts! Why, God, why?” That’s all good and well. We weren’t created to be robots. God doesn’t want us pretending like we’re good and holy and faithful all the time. What He wants is authenticity. Bringing that hurt to God, asking Him why the heck things are going the way they’re going—this is a good thing! It’s in wrestling with God that we know Him. Don’t be afraid to be like Jacob—imperfect and yet one of God’s most beloved children.
On the other hand, our hurt does us no good if we allow it to paralyze us. We have to be willing to come back to the Lord—even when it hurts, and even when we could just as easily point the finger at God. You can’t stay mad at God forever. Really, if you know Him, you can’t be mad at Him at all, because He is a God of so much mercy and grace. He loves each of us so deeply, and He really does not want to see us suffer. He just wants what’s best for us.
We have to be willing to believe that. We have to be willing to take that leap of faith and say:
“God, I don’t really understand why this is happening right now, but I know You’re in control and I know what You’ve got in store is better than what I’d carelessly settle for right now. You’ve proven Your faithfulness before, and I know it continues even now, so, Lord, I’m giving this hurt back to You and I’m choosing to believe in Your promise again.”
Say to the Lord: “This hurts, ‘but you, Lord, are enthroned forever.’”
Live the hurt, but when its time has come, commit to choosing hope. Have faith in the God who loves you—the God who is working all things for your good. This is the constant in our lives. This is the one thing that remains through every good we welcome and say goodbye to over the course of a lifetime.
“This we have as an anchor for our souls.”
Your faith may not be big enough to move mountains, but be decisive about choosing to place your trust in the Lord, and He’ll do the hard work of moving away the hurt inside—even if it’s only little by little, day after day. His mercy is new every morning. Lean into it.
 Mark 11:23
 Genesis 32:23-33
 Psalm 102:13
 Romans 8:28
 1 Corinthians 13:8-13
 Hebrews 6:19
 Lamentations 3:22-23